When my values start to fly out the window in a situation when they aren't even respected, is when I know something is wrong.
When my motivations are to prove someone wrong and make them miserable, is when I know something is wrong.
When I feel regretful about things, when I normally wouldn't, is when I know something is wrong.

I've let myself get completely side tracked and I need to get back to where I was before. I have really bad control issues as far as this goes and I just can't let that control go. It's not okay and I am changing it now. I'm not sad, I'm not mad, I'm just baffled. I feel so foolish for thinking of things as something completely different than they were.

And I have a crazy crush on a friend, he has no idea and it kind of stinks.